The Black Project and The Black Fund partner to launch #BeyondTheSmile
This weekend saw Brianna O’Reilly, the founder of The Black Project, partnering with sisters and founders of The Black Fund Leigh-Anne Pinnock and Sairah Pinnock, to launch their mental health campaign #BeyondTheSmile.
The campaign was born after the passing of Stephen Boss, better known as tWitch, on December 13th 2022. In the aftermath, the reaction from many was the same - Stephen was always smiling, he was the happiest in the room, he was always making others laugh. But beyond the smile, the truth was Stephen was struggling. And so often when we learn that someone has passed away because of mental health struggles, the rhetoric is the same. “You’d never have known, they always had a smile on their face.”
And part of the reason is that we don’t look beyond the smile - in others or in ourselves. When people ask us how we are, we plaster on a smile and say we’re fine and people accept that. With this campaign they ask you to share what’s beyond your smiles, but also serves as a reminder to each of us to look beyond the smiles presented to us.
As part of the launch, each of the founders shared their own #BeyondTheSmile stories, and invite you to share yours. Share them on instagram using the #BeyondTheSmile and tag both accounts (@theblack.project and @the_black_fund), or share on twitter or facebook using the hashtag. Remember, it’s okay not to be okay, and it’s super okay to talk about it.
#BeyondTheSmile for Brianna.
How are you doing? No really, how are you doing? Most of us ask that question and expect the answer is going to be a smile and “I’m not bad, how about you.” And that’s exactly how we answer when we’re asked.
But the truth for many of us is that there’s a lot more going on. I know that’s the truth for me.
I’m exhausted. That’s just my permanent state. I’ve been battling chronic pain with an allergy to pain medication for over half my life now and that has significant impacts. There’s the obvious - I’m in pain every moment of my life. One of my conditions is one of the most painful known to medicine, so the pain is significant. Then there’s the less obvious. I haven’t had a good nights sleep in 13 years. I am a fiercely independent mind in a body that means I cannot do things independently. That puts strains on relationships, especially with my mum, which causes a lot of mental distress because I don’t want a strained relationship with someone who is my best friend. There’s a sense of being stuck - in my body, in my situation, in a village I’m not happy or at peace in. When the world isn’t built for your success, you have to battle for it. And isn’t that ironic? The extra effort you have to put in to get anywhere or anything when you’re disabled. You’re perceived as having less to give, but you have to give so much more just to get in the door. I’ve spoken before about how racism has meant that part of my family don’t speak. There’s a lot of guilt there. The idea that if I wasn’t here, if I wasn’t me, my mum would still have her brother. I know the responsibility isn’t on me, but it doesn’t change the guilt. Guilt is exhausting. There’s also fear. About where this country is and where it’s headed. Anxiety about will I ever be able to leave? Will I ever be in a position to get to where I want to be?
Being a person is hard. And sometimes we need to be given permission to be honest about that.
#BeyondTheSmile launch continues, and here’s @sairah_pinnock’s.
I am definitely one of those people that smiles off my struggles so being part of this campaign had me a little lost for words, then it dawned on me how important and significant it can be to open up about what you’re dealing with in silence. This is something I definitely need to learn to do but I will start here. Beyond my smile is a women who is so tired of always having to be strong, it’s like I can’t be any other way because there’s no one who can be strong for me. It’s something I am trying to navigate and overcome but it’s definitely a slow process. Someone like me also finds it hard to put up their hand and say Hey I need help or hey I’m not ok. It’s just so much easier to smile through it and put out this strong I got my shit together persona and for the past 33 years it’s worked so well that I reckon if I actually told people hey I’m not ok they properly wouldn’t even take me seriously. I definitely think this is a deep rooted issue that many women must face after being left disappointed or those with protector personalities.
#BeyondTheSmile launch weekend is wrapping up, but not until we hear from Leigh-Anne 🧡
I have struggled recently with the pressures of being a mum. Juggling everything such as my career, fiancé, travelling and the stresses of life in general. Whilst trying to be the best mum that I can be, is something that I have found really hard. I am so used to burning the candle at both ends, but physically it's impossible to do that now. I have to remember that it's ok to just press pause. Slow down, tackle one thing at a time. And also, remember that I'm doing GREAT! There's such a pressure to be this strong woman that has it all together. That can handle anything thrown at her. Truth is I'm still figuring it all out. And that's ok.
I also need to remember to ask for help and reach out to people around me. We all need support and there is no shame in saying I am NOT ok.
We need to remember to look #BeyondTheSmile.